for the whole thirty seconds it took me to think it up …

Ah, Florida. When Laser Beam and I traded floors for lawns, I figured I knew what I was getting into. Run a mower over the lawn every few weeks, edge once a quarter or so, cut down weed palm branches and hope they fell in their entirety during hurricanes. And I wouldn’t have to worry about sweeping under the table and vacuuming under the beds.

Moving to Cabbage Mere changed that notion. Edging to keep the grass out of the sidewalk and give it the finely expensive waxed look that is … requested by the city and Home Ogres association takes a bit more frequent manicuring than once a quarter. And the sweeping! I’d have done less sweeping if I’d kept the inside and let Laser Beam do the outside.

I’m not a fan of electric blowers, or gas ones, and there aren’t any decent mowers (my electric mower is a bagless mulcher, rather useless on sidewalk clean up) that vacuum the debris up, either. But after an evening of attacking the lawnatic fringe (full moon + streetlight for a cool-air cutting experience) I was struck by inspiration.

What are weeds palm tree fronds but giant brooms? I’ve got a sidewalk, a street, and a driveway to sweep, and a frond at tall as me would be ideal for sweeping the cuttings off of the road. And that frond in the front is turning yellow anyway …

I grabbed my limb saw and took down my likely helper. Laid the saw aside, and attacked the front walk. Big, swooping motions as I got the heft of the branch under control, and by gum, it worked! Instead of 30 minutes and a sore back bending over a little house broom, or buying a heavy industrial brush broom, me and Mister Frond had the walk, drive, and road back to walkable condition in almost no time.

It almost makes me not mind the weedy towers in my front yard.